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This job is killing me. I'm teaching non-Mass Comm. students again. I'm handling three Speech and Oral Comm. classes. It's like going back to basics. But if I will handle all 7 major subjects, I know I'd die early.
My mind actually started wandering and I am hoping that my feet would lead me where my mind wanders.
A part of me says I'm not happy anymore. This may be the signal that I have to go -- go out of the system before it's too late. When I attended my 9th general assembly here, I prayed to all saints that I hope that would be my last GA to attend to in this institution. I'm just being honest when I say I lost my heart. My heart's no longer in this job. I feel bad because MC is not a priority course in this school. It's very hard to get a proposal accepted if it does not guarantee return in terms of money. What's worse, I see and hear a lot of concerns but I just couldn't do anything about them.
The best thing to do now is to distance myself from students and even parents so I changed my sim card. I was actually relieved right after I started using a new number. Nobody else but my family reaches me. I've silently said goodbye to all concerns in school. I do school stuff in school but never outside school. Now I am starting to realize that it is very difficult to detach myself from the stuff and people I learned to love. All I want now is to be detached from any concern here in school.
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