The call that bothered me today

I was still in school when I received a call early this night. It was a phone interview with Teletech located somewhere in San Fernando. The interviewer told me that I applied as Accent and Conversation English Trainer. I thought of it for a little while, then I realized, yeah, perhaps I did apply.

I actually didn't remember applying but I guess I did.

After several minutes of on-the-spot interview, the person in the other line asked me if I could possibly start work by August 11. That question made me stop and do some reflections.

Can I do that? Am I ready to leave this school this soon?

I know I wanted so much to get out of this system. This is the reason I applied to several companies to the point of forgetting where and when and for what position I applied for. All I wanted was to leave and find workplace somewhere. This is what my heart tells me every single day that I go to school. Every time I walk on its ground, I wonder if my feet are on the right track. I wonder until when I would be walking on that ground surrounded by people who have no freedom to be free.

Another question bothered me: Am I ready to leave my students in the middle of the semester? Can I say goodbye to the students who need guidance from the only Mass Comm. major in the department?

I guess not.

When I came back to my senses, I told the interviewer, "Not that soon. I'm sorry."

That signaled the end of the phone interview.

At the back of my mind, I was asking myself, did I let a rare chance pass? Did I miss something for saying NO?

I couldn't figure it out. I still feel bothered until now.

Perhaps it's because the call reminded me of what my heart longs for.

In the end, the only answer I can give myself is THIS IS NOT THE TIME.

Maybe.

Maybe.

Maybe.

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